I know you are all like, “What the heck, Koopgirl, stop posting! Your life is not that exciting!” But seriously – this is a must-post bit of info.


Meet Lesbian Lady, who lives directly beneath me with Lesbian Lover.



Hi Lesbian Lady. She is very tall and drives a van with bumperstickers that say things like “If You’re Not Outraged, You’re Not Paying Attention” and “Real Women Drive Trucks.”


One time I found Lesbian Lady and Lesbian Lover asleep on top of eachother in the laundry room. I guess the spin cycle got them going. (ahem – bad joke.)


Fast forward to yesterday. I found out Lesbian Lady is actually a man named Stephen. Stephen likes children; actually, he likes them a little too much because he’s twice been charged with child molestation, amounting to 15 years sentenced jail time. Now Stephen is turning over a new leaf as Lesbian Lady and lives in the apartment under me. The End.


I guess that means I really should stop walking the halls at night in my Elmo slippers singing “The Ants Go Marching.” Dang. (Sorry, another bad joke. )


That’s just one story of the 300 registered sex offenders within a two mile radius of my apartment. Sometimes knowing less makes it easier to sleep at night. Or eat at night, for that matter.


…………………………….


7/120 – and I like this music when I work out.

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20 thoughts on “

  1. That’s comforting… :eek:You do have quite the stories without ever leaving your apartment! The rest of us have to run around the world a couple times to find so many reasons to invent excuses like your John Cusack-lookalike husband. =)

  2. I totally relate to your living situation!!!! When I lived in an apartment with some roomies in Florida, the lady above us was a lesbian too and she was also a Cop!! So and her lover were the loudest people I’ve ever met. It sounded like a bowling alley above our heads. One time, her gun went off and shot a hole through her floor, through our ceiling and lodged itself into our floor by our couch!! Luckily only one roomie was home and she was in another room. I totally know what you mean!!!! hahahha.
    Oh lots of pictures indeed. 🙂

  3. so, tristan and isolde. the sex, honestly, didn’t stick in my head (maybe that’s comforting?), so my first attempt at remembering yielded a “no way- def not soft-core porn.” but then i thought… i guess there was some nakedness going on… but i don’t know, i guess it wasn’t any worse off than the notebook…. i dunno. i went to see the movie hesitantly anyway…. but i enjoyed it a lot. and there’s always the idea that you can close your eyes if it’s too much.

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