Fill in the blank: I could never marry someone who _______ .
I could never marry someone who doesn’t use turn signals.
If it wasn’t clear already, I am officially going to hell.
This morning I stole a box from the United States Post Office. I didn’t realize until later, as I started my car that, “Oh, I was probably supposed to pay for this.”
Not only that, but as I was leaving the P.O. with my stolen goods, I missed a little old black man holding the door for me. He grunted indignantly and said, “Well! I just held the door for nothing!”
“I’m so sorry,” I replied, “I didn’t even notice.”
“God tells me to do one good thing a day, and that was it! Completely wasted!!”
“Gosh… I really am sorry…wow…”