Jeff (The Boss): Who hid all these eggs?
Kathy (The Office Manager): I don’t know – the Easter Bunny.
Jeff: Well, who’s the Easter Bunny? I’ll bet it was you, Kathy. No, I’ll bet it was Maryann.
Kathy: Why do you say that?
Jeff: Because Maryann’s weird like that.
I went to open a new bank account yesterday. First, I went to Union Federal, lured by their promise of a free cruise for two. After standing in line for an eternity and getting a very distinct “white trash” vibe, I decided to go with my gut (that “if it seems too good to be true, it probably is”) and left. Next, I went to Chase – they seem to be taking over the whole world along with Starbucks and Gannett, why not me, too? I was pretty happy with the service I got there, so now I’ve got a new checking account and my first ever savings account (unless you count a hollow champagne bottle in which I used to squirrel away my paper route cash). When I got ready to leave, the consultant went to give me my “freebie” for opening a new account – guess what I got? An Ipod nano? A digital camera? A beer cooler? Nope. I got a coupon for one free bagel from Einsteins. A freaking bagel. I could have had a cruise!!!! But no, I took the bagel. And my new best banking friend laughed right along with me.
My accident-prone rut continues. This week, I’ve also broken a window shade, burned two bagels, jammed the copier, multiply pinched myself folding up a 6 foot portable screen, and exploded one beer over three rugs. And that’s just the stuff I can remember.
Not to mention that I slightly offended a favored co-worker… he found out I’m going to Nashville this weekend, where he still lives, and that I’m staying at the Days Inn there. I had sort of put off telling him because A) I didn’t want to be pushy and ask myself over – he’s in the middle of moving, for the love; and B) I’ve been looking forward to just getting away from everything and everybody and shutting myself into a generic motel room. Weird, I know. But after 6 years of experiencing the fictional “Hoosier Hospitality,” I honestly thought it wouldn’t be a big deal. Now I feel bad, even though he’s just teasing. But when I think about it, if he were going to Bozeman, I’d really want to tell him about where to stay and what to see, too. And if I lived there still, I want him to feel welcome to stay with me. I guess reciprocating hospitality is as important as giving it?!? Dang. I suck.